(Stellaciel's making me. I think it's reciprocation for implying she was making an implication. I SAID I WAS SORRY! Or, rather, I implied my apologies...hmm.)

1. Being the official Ughy PR, I was doing my usual PR-y things (aka surfing the web and pretending to be productive) when Stellaciel asked me to find a website that makes customized stickers so I could stick them on random people and hope they're intrigued enough to come to our site. (Or I also propositioned that we put Gorilla Glue on the backs and write on the stickers "To find out how to remove this sticker, please come to this website." She seemed to think this would create negative connotations for the Ughy Club, but I didn't necessarily see that as a bad thing...)

So. I entered Stellaciel's beautiful Ughy graphics into the sticker generator, as well as my name, email, and phone number (always the phone number!) and was notified that a Sticker Sales Representative would be contacting me shortly. A STICKER SALES REP? Whatever happened to good ol' salespeople? I mean, did they have to tag on the "sticker" thing? Do their business cards say "Luigi Glockenspiel, Sticker Sales Representative" on them?

I wonder how a Sticker Sales Rep would act. Would they be shady, black-market types? Sleazy volcano insurance salesmen? Big-smile vaccuum salesmen? Perhaps - dare I say it - remniscent of the Quaker Oatmeal man?

You know what, I hope this Sticker Sales Rep calls me. And I hope he has a goofy name and a goofy voice and a handlebar mustache that I'll be able to sense through the phone. Because that might just complete my life. *sighs longingly*

2. So I've been working all week. And no, it wasn't writing or even severely procrastated AP Lang shitake mushrooms. It was a summer scholarship program thing, and I worked really hard. So I get all six essays complete (yes, six!) and, well, I half-assed the last one but hopefully they'll like my reference to "The Force" and "whip and chair." Anyway.

I went into the post office for the first time in order to mail that baby. I got my envelope (after much chin-stroking deliberating which one to get, and then realizing they were the exact same envelopes, just the one in the front of the second row had been flipped around) and stood directly behind the lady currently being served. She kept giving me evil eyes. From her pocket. They were slimey. *cough* Okay, getting distracted...

Anyway, after she's done being served she goes, "You know, young lady, there's an invisible line between those pillars that you're supposed to wait behind out of courtesy."

I erupted into gigglesnorts and she harrumphed away. But seriously. The "invisible line of courtesy"? I was supposed to know that HOW, evil eye lady?

Anyway, then the post office lady takes my package and says something I can't quite make out. I THOUGHT she might have said, "You need to give me a confirmation code to mail this," so I was like, "You mean like a password? Okay - [vocalizes her goofy Ughy Club password that she can't give to you all because Stellaciel says that our plethora of viewers will be jumping at the chance to impersonate me]."

Her face contorted into one of these o.0 and she was carted to the hospital and never seen again.

Well, not really, but it turned out that she needed to give ME a confirmation code, not the other way around...and it also cost me five extra bucks but I didn't catch the part where she said that (she mumbles like that guy off of "Office Space," Milton, or whatever) which royally pissed me off. Really, I went and got a crown from Burger King after that just to display my anger to the world.

Mostly I just got strange looks but a good percentage understood and sympathized. Thank you, good percentage. Your condolences are much appreciated.

3. I'm dropping out of the talent show contest because I've decided that my a capella is nothing to be admired, and, in fact, something to be run from, fast. It was a very funny piece, too, but I don't seem to be able to keep from warboling when I'm trying to be so loud & comedic. Shame, shame. To make it up to my roommate who was going to get to dress up in guy's clothing and wear a beard, we're going to school as men tomorrow. Beards and all. And some of the guys here have gone to school in skirts before so they can't stop us without some serious litigation and headaches! MWAHAHAHAHA! Although I'm not sure a judge would really sympathize with our case...

4. I'm doing this instead of my character charts or writing my screenplay or finishing my short story, all due tomorrow or Tuesday. Shiznack. I must love you all.

Jules.